The Award I Didn’t Want and Why It Made me Quit Writing

It is okay in difficult times to put your writing on hold, here is what my break taught me.

At 3 am Sunday morning, I was woken to my 22-month-old daughter in a very distressed state. She was shivering so bad, she could not stop. On arrival of the ambulance, she started to go into a seizure. Three seizures later we were told her temperature was 41.9.

“Wow,” the nurse said. “The highest I have ever seen.”

It was an award I never wanted. The brilliant staff at the hospital not only saved her life but also put her back together in three days. Although now there are signs she is still poorly, she has bounced back to almost her normal cheeky self.

I’m Quitting Writing

Sat in the hospital watching her little chest rise and fall I was determined to quit writing. All those hours spent over a keyboard seemed wasted time, the time I could have been spending with her.

I posted a message on my Facebook group and walked away.

There were times in the hospital, I thought about writing, but the words had escaped me. I had no inclination to try and find them.

From the fact you are reading this post, you know this wasn’t a permanent thing. At the time though, I could have walked away without a second thought.

It is Okay to Have a Break

Today is my first day back at work. The full-time hustle. Physically and mentally I am drained. As I sit in the office I have a strange urge, I need to write about my experiences.

I need to get back to my therapist — writing.

Now I realise it was fine to have a break. So I missed my publishing schedule, so what? My little girl is the reason I write, she will always be my priority. Did everyone stop following me because I was missing for a week? No, in fact, my stats have improved.

The support I have received from my writing friends has been overwhelming. I am grateful to every one of you.

Today the words flow easier than they have previously.

Moving forward

For those that don’t know the work schedule I have set myself is vast. I have had to come up with a plan to manage them all.

Time off has given me the chance to seek balance in my life. No more working over the laptop when the little one is awake.

My main priorities will be my personal writing and mentor group. The rest of social media, I will manage in breaks at work or times when she is asleep.

A good writer needs balance and sometimes it takes a traumatic event to see this.

If you are struggling, it is okay to put yourself and your family first. A break is as good as a holiday.

Thank you to all those who have sent a message, reached out and supported me. Your words have meant a great deal, during this difficult time.

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2 thoughts on “The Award I Didn’t Want and Why It Made me Quit Writing

  1. In the past, I have struggled with my priorities. Mismanaged priorities can affect health, relationships, and self.

    I am happy to hear your precious baby girl is doing better. 😊

    Liked by 1 person

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